“This year’s been a lot for a lot of people and it’s probably made a lot of people look at themselves in the year and figure out who they are,” he shared. “I’ve ran from myself for a long time, I’ve hated myself for a long time. I’m gay. I came to terms with that earlier this year, and the next step in all of this was sort of letting people know. … I’m the happiest and healthiest I’ve ever been in my life. That means the world to me.”
Colton shared that coming to terms with his sexuality though wasn't easy and brought suicidal thoughts.
“I think overall, the reason why now is because I got to a place where I didn’t think I was ever going to share this I don’t, I would have rather died than, say, I’m gay," he admitted. "I think that was sort of my wake-up call.”
The former football player joined The Bachelor franchise for season 14 of The Bachelorette while competing for Becca Kufrin’s heart in 2018. He later found love with Cassie Randolph, 25, on season 23 of the dating series, which aired in 2019. They shocked fans by splitting in May 2020.
Check out more revelations from the interview below:
"Yes [I loved her,] and that only made it harder and more confusing for me. I loved everything about her, and it's hard for me to articulate exactly what my emotions were in going through that relationship with her because I obviously had an internal fight going on. I would just say that I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart. I'm sorry for any pain and emotional stress I caused. I wish that it wouldn't have happened the way that it did. I wish that I had been courageous enough to fix myself before I broke anybody else."
On Why Now:
"Obviously this year’s been a lot for a lot of people, and it’s probably when a lot of people look at themselves in the mirror and figure out what they’ve been running from and what they’ve been putting off in their lives. I ran from myself for a long time. I hated myself for a long time. I’m gay, and I came to terms with that earlier this year and have been processing it. The next step in all of this was sort of letting people know."
On When He Knew:
"I've known that I've been different since age 6, and I couldn't process it and I couldn't put my finger on what it was until high school, my freshman year, when I knew I was gay. By that time, I had already grown up in the Catholic Church, I had gone to Catholic grade school. I had learned in the Bible that [being] gay is a sin. I had made mistakes in my sports and in my athletic career and when you make mistakes, that play was 'gay.' .... Gay was always affiliated with a connotation of negativity and I think there's a lot of things when I look back, I'm like, no wonder I held it in."
On Going On 'The Bachelor':
"I literally remember praying, praying to God the morning I found out that I was on Bachelor and thanking him for making me straight. I remember that vividly and saying like, 'Finally, you're letting me be straight. Finally, you're giving me a wife, a fiancée and then I'm gonna have the kids and then I'm gonna have the house and then I'm gonna have all this."
On If He's Dating:
"I'll just go on record saying like I still haven't had an emotional connection with a man. I've never allowed myself to."